"Just 'cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town." -- George Carlin

Sunday, February 3, 2008

YAY, Yoga!

I finally made it back to my yoga. Today I went for the first time since lil' Monkey was born. It felt really good to go back and I SURVIVED my first class. I was really scared that I wouldn't. For those who don't know (I'm guessing everyone that reads this blog already knows this), I practice Bikram Yoga. It's the crazy hot yoga where the room is 100 degrees that most people think is completely, well, crazy. But it fits my personality perfectly. I am, afterall, the crazy mama. ;)

You see, I can't stand doing the "gym thing". You know, walk on a treadmill for a half-hour, then do some weight training, yada, yada. It bores me to tears. I've tried watching the televisions to make the time pass or bringing a magazine to keep me going. But in the end, I'm just not satisfied and never ready to go back. I've also tried what I call "incense yoga" and what Bikram calls "frou frou" or "furniture" yoga (or so said one of the teachers who had met him personally). Those types of yoga classes are just too ostentatious for me. Maybe I just don't think singing Kum Ba Yah with a bunch of strangers and burning incense is going make me feel better or to put me in touch with anything except the need to run out of there screaming.

Also, I guess you could say I've never been very sporty. I was on a bowling league when I was really young (6 until I was 9, maybe 10?) and that was okay. My cousin got involved in softball and my mom thought it might be a good thing for me to do as well. I hated the pressure of being at bat or trying to catch the ball in the outfield. I prayed at each game that they'd sit me. Then the nail in the coffin for softball -- while at bat, I hit the ball very far and was so excited that I threw the bat straight into the catcher's stomach. She was on the ground for a very long time but recovered. I felt horrible. I begged my parents to take me out of the league. It was close to the end of the season so they convinced me to finish it. I guessed they were hoping I'd get over it. I still haven't really. Then I went to ONE team sport try-out in high school (field hockey) and immediately decided that I wasn't fond of doing sit-ups in the mud at 7:30 on a Saturday morning. So that was that for team sports.

However, I am somewhat competitive. Inwardly competitive. Usually, I'm just competing with myself and thinking I should be as good as someone else. I couldn't see myself talking smack or trying to compete for team position or ranking. I'd just fester inside. Therefore, Bikram Yoga is that perfect balance between of being challenging enough to keep me interested and not so competitive that I just implode due to the pressure of being good enough. I have only me to answer to and I'm learning not to be so hard on myself.

So today was a good day. And it's true what the instructors say about muscle memory! I've done this type of yoga off and on since 2001 but thought because I took 15 months off from it, I might not be able to do it any longer. However, I did pretty well. I couldn't get to the same point in the poses that I could prior to taking my hiatus but overall, I'm satisfied with myself. AND I didn't sit half of the class out due to the heat (this had happened previously when returning from a couple months break)! Now I just need to figure out a way to fit this into my schedule.

YAY, yoga!