Funny Quote -- Week of 1/6/08

Stephen Colbert from The Colbert Report:

"Did the pundits not make ourselves clear? ... If you keep voting the way you want, rather than the way we tell you you want, well, then we pundits are just going to stop telling you how to think!"

Good stuff! South Carolina's primary is coming up! Too bad they wouldn't let him on the ballot. So much for the "any American citizen born in the U.S. can be President" line we all heard growing up.

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1573288/20071101/id_0.jhtml
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1107/6674_Page2.html

My tired little baby ...

... do you need a kiss?

This is how his favorite book begins. And Monkey received plenty of kisses this past week.

Thursday morning, shortly after my mother arrived to help out, DH and I decided that lil' Monkey should go to the hospital again. His diarrhea diapers just weren't diminishing in number, he still hadn't peed and the test where you press the fatty part of their toe to see how quickly the color comes back wasn't satisfactory for us.

So mom and I took him in while DH headed off for work. It took the ER nurses another 3 tries to get a vein for the IV again (that's 3 on Tuesday, 3 on Thursday). This time I wasn't so brave. I didn't cry but the stress of it was getting to me because this time Monkey knew what was coming and cried harder and longer than last time. I felt my chest tightening.

Because he hadn't been urinating very well and had lost a POUND in the past week, they decided to admit him for the night. Not good news for me since I had put off all of my work for the week due to the previous hospital visit. I had something due the next day and knew now that it would be nearly impossible to get it done. Plus, I wanted to call DH to let him know the deal. Plus, I was feeling bad because mom drove 2 hours to help me out around the house and with Monkey but there we were in the hospital. So I had all of this in my head floating around and I could barely think due to the lack of sleep in recent days. So the stress of all of it was weighing in pretty hard. At one point during the day, it took all I had not to either punch something or break down and cry (I did eventually have a moment on Friday where I cried a bit). I don't think my brain has quite recovered yet so I'll apologize now for the scattered nature of this post.

The crib at the hospital

The nurses at the Pediatrics wing LOVED Monkey. He can be quite the charmer even under stressful circumstances apparently. He had the splint thing on his arm again with the IV tightly wrapped so he couldn't pull it out. He enjoyed playing what I can only describe as jump rope with an invisible leprachaun using the IV tubing. He'd just swing the tube round and round.

The room he was in did have a bed for me to sleep in overnight (not comfortable but better than a chair). They had free little soda and juices for the parents and did send up one meal tray at dinner, breakfast and lunch time. DH came up after work and took mom home with him so they could sleep in something other than a chair. I forgot Monkey's favorite book but think I did a pretty good job remembering it while kissing him goodnight. Not quite the same without the book but he did go to sleep and slept well until the techs came in for their routine temperature check (which happened every 3-4 hours).

The next day mom came to keep me company while we waited for news about whether Monkey's bicarbonate numbers had improved (this would indicate his system was keeping up with the diarrhea).

Monkey's bandages from IV and blood tests

All in all, we're both glad to be home. Unfortunately, my mom caught it yesterday and had to stay another night at our house to recover. She's feeling better and headed home this morning so she could do the rest of her recovery in a more familiar place.

Monkey expressed his pleasure of being home last night by breastfeeding for 17 minutes (he's usually done in 7 max) and falling asleep at the breast. When I put him into his crib I realized that he still needed some pants. He woke up a little cranky while I put them on but when he realized where he was he promptly fell asleep again.

BTW, this turned out NOT to be the dreaded Rotavirus like we thought (which is good since he's been getting the vaccine for that!). The doctor thinks it might have been the Norovirus ... you know, the one from the cruise ships.

Also, in case anyone was actually wondering, my deadline was extended to Monday. Guess I better get off of here and do some work!

Politics Wed -- The Candidates

This is only the second installment of my "Politics Wednesday" posts and it's going to be a disappointment. At least, it is for me.

Straight out of the gate, I was going to take on one of the major issues the media covers constantly. But after some consideration, I figured it might be a good idea to get a run down of each of the candidates' platform. Then as I was trying to put the list together of all of them I realized it was just too much information (probably why most of us just use what little the news sound bytes give us). Then I was going to do only the front-runners.

But due to the kind of week I've had, I'm only going to point you in the direction of WashingtonPost.com's candidate breakdown which seems more in depth than most of the other news sites I used while researching. I do apologize. I had great hopes for this week's post but lil' Monkey's virus just isn't getting better. Also, if you go to the home page of my web site, I have a nifty little widget on there from WashingtonPost.com that does a brief run down of each of them with the latest news headlines on each.

Will try to do more next week.

Hospital visits with child (focus on dehydration)

Little Hospital Gown -- am I sick for thinking
this was too cute to not take a picture?

The saga continues ...

I generally don't like to post photos of myself or my child with our faces on this blog. However, I just had to this time to illustrate a point. Plus, it took forever to get them emailed from my phone to my account! Karma, don't bite me in the butt for this one! ... on second thought ... yes, I'm using the cheesy black bars.

Went to the doctor's office today because Monkey hasn't been peeing that much. They confirmed that he was dehydrated and needed to go to the hospital. So off we went.

Here are some things to remember when you go to the ER with your little one (some just apply if your child is dehydrated):

• Just because you are wheeling a stroller, doesn't mean the person that pulled into the parking lot at the same time you did will not race you to the counter to fill out the admission form first. We were called in first anyway! HA HA, woman with bad roots and unreadable poorly done shoulder tattoo!! (I get catty when anxious.)



• Do NOT sit any where near anyone else, especially their kids, unless you have no choice -- REGARDLESS if it's the last seat with a view of the waiting room television (my mistake). Inevitably, their kid will cough without their hand in front of their mouth about 2 feet from your child's face and/or stroller.



• DO bring plenty of toys and other supplies to the hospital to entertain and take care of your little one. I recommend cloth books and little toys if your child is an infant/toddler and going in for dehydration (see why later). For some reason, I actually had the sense to stop by the house and pick up a few more of these items prior to heading to the hospital. If your child uses a pacifier, bring a couple because they aim for the dirty floor where hundreds of sick people have tread. You'll thank yourself later.



• Bring pen and paper. Don't rely on the discharge instructions being as specific as what the doctor and multiple nurses will tell you (hence leading to confusion and memory loss when you arrive home and are trying to figure out what to do in order to prevent your child from going back to the hospital). I did not do this. And I SHOULD KNOW BETTER! My memory is crap!



• Take your stroller and/or car seat. Skip the car seat if your stroller reclines for baby to sleep. Consider it an extra set of hands and an absolute MUST if you and the babe are on your own for whatever reason. Thank goodness I thought of this! I surely would have been suffering greatly if I hadn't.



• If your hospital has them, ask if they have a room with a pediatric gurney available. I didn't realize they even existed and the kind nurses put me in a room with one this time (they didn't when we took him to the hospital at 4 months). It really helps to have at least a 2X3 foot area where you can block your mobile 7-month old (probably not needed for a 3-4 month old since they're not extremely mobile).



• I didn't have to do it this time but I've been in situations where I'd wished I had asked the nurse when we would be receiving our discharge papers the MOMENT treatment by the doctor was finished. The nurses this time just brought them in RIGHT WHEN Monkey was finishing his last IV treatment! It was AWESOME!




Monkey before the IV drip -- lethargic.



These tips are for strictly if your child is going in for dehydration



• Realize that they are most likely going to give them fluids intravenously and prepare mentally for that. That means the nurses will have to find a tiny little vine in a tiny little dehydrated body (can't be easy). This might take, oh I don't know, 1 ... 2 ... 3 tries (in our case it was 3). Then your child's arm will be placed on a soft splint and wrapped with that self-adhesive bandage stuff. This is primarily so your child will not chew and/or yank out the intravenous drip. But if they are dehydrated, they will not be too interested in it but still mildly amused (more to come on this).



• First they will take blood to evaluate the level of dehydration and then put a drip on while they wait for the results. Theory is a little more fluid couldn't hurt if they are only a little dehydrated.



• Depending on how dehydrated your child is, they will administer various amounts of fluid. If it is really severe and the kidneys have shut down due to the lack of hydration, your child will be staying overnight. Luckily, we were not in this predicament.



• For each bolus administered (HA HA -- remembered that medical term!), you will need to wait approximately 40-60 minutes. We needed two; the first took 60 minutes, the second they sped up to 40 minutes.



• I'm guessing it depends on the severity of the dehydration in your child, but at some point it's going to start working. And when I say "start working", I mean your little bundle of joy will become just that -- a little bundle of joy who now has complete interest and strong intent on yanking that tube, chewing on the ace bandage thingy, getting angry because they can't manuever with the splinted arm. This is also where the cloth books, small toys and pediatric gurney come in handy.




Monkey AFTER the IV drip -- bundle of joy.


• Ask for SPECIFIC feeding and changing instructions from your doctor. This is where that pen and paper will come into play. I got two different directions from the discharging nurse and the doctor. It seemed like I could play it down the middle. That is, until I got home and DH started finding holes in that theory, then when my memory failed me on what else was said and the discharge instructions didn't clear things up for us, we had to make not one, but two phone calls back to the ER to clarify. (DH is always getting onto me for not drilling the doctors like I'm in the army. I'm just not good at thinking of the follow up questions like he is. Or retaining pretty much anything but the basics.)

The local hospital here has been really great during the 4 times we've been to it in the past 7 months (once for Monkey's birth, twice for Monkey's health (this time and the time he fell out of his swing -- uh yeah, won't go into that one) and once for myself because I cut my hand while opening a new toy for Monkey (it was apparently mommy-proof packaging). The nurses and doctor were very nice and reassured me putting Monkey through that was the right thing to do. Which is EXACTLY what I needed to hear.

Overall, I think it was a positive experience and that I did a GREAT job taking Monkey to the hospital by myself. Yes, blatant pat on the back -- YAY ME! This wasn't the first time but the last time didn't involve multiple tries for a vein and I'm surprised that I didn't shed one tear or get majorly worked up in anyway. YES, dear, I will work on my interrogation skills with the doctors and nurses and this time, bring a pen and some paper. OR better yet! Maybe I'll buy one of those recorder things from that commercial! You know the one! Where the lady tells it her parking spot number and then joyfully plays it back ... again... and again ... and again.

Correction: We've been to the hospital FIVE times in the past 7 months. I forgot about the time when Monkey was only a week old and we were both nervous new parents who couldn't understand why he would cry for 4 hours straight and spit up everything he ate. Can anyone say GERD?

It's Contagious!

After our lil' Monkey came down with a stomach virus late Friday night, DH and I were pretty much exhausted the next day. Then about 3:00 am Sunday morning, I woke up with a burning feeling in my stomach and felt the need to burp every few minutes. Then it started for me. The vomiting, the diarrhea, the dizziness and that lasted pretty much all day.

DH was fantastic as he took care of our lil' Monkey, diarrhea diapers and all, for the entire day. However, at about 1:00 am this morning, he started feeling the symptoms. So now we're all home, DH fighting it and lil' Monkey and I are in recovery.

I hope next weekend is better!

Poor Monkey's Stomach Virus

This weekend has not been fun for poor Lil' Monkey. Last night, he went to bed at his usual time of 7:30 but little over 2 hours later we heard gurgled cries from his room. I went into the room and noticed something funny about his face (the only light we have in the room is very dim, on purpose). I felt his face and around his little wiggly body to realize that he had vomited EVERYWHERE. His face was in a pile of it and there were two more piles elsewhere in the crib. Practically the whole mattress was covered in it.

After turning on the hall light, I lifted him out and realized it was ALL OVER his poor little face! His eyelids and lashes were covered; it was in his nose, his ears and all down one arm. So I rushed to get his clothes off of him and yelled for DH to get off of The Game (I may be posting about this later) and help me with this mess.

It smelled awful and was the color of salmon (makes sense since he had carrots and bananas yesterday). Monkey was so upset and it took a lot for me not to cry at that moment due to the wretched smell and extreme empathy for him.

So after cleaning him up, putting a new sleeper on and breastfeeding him, changing his sheet and mattress pad, we put him back to bed. I could tell he was miserable and felt bad because he just lay in his crib afterward staring into space as I stroked his back and petted his head. Meanwhile, I'm having an inner struggle not to panic because I've inherited the worry-wart gene from my mother and find that my reactions are little severe sometimes when compared to others.

About hour and half later, he's crying again. I go into his room and this time, the bed is just wet. Really wet. No color just wetness. He had thrown up all of the breast milk which left about a 2 X 3 foot area of the mattress soaked, not to mention all of one side of the new sleeper. Out of the crib he comes and as I'm putting him down on the changing pad, he starts vomiting some more. I couldn't help but say "Oh my God" as it went all down the front of him and all over my shoulder, which alerted DH that something was wrong (he later protested this as I'm supposed to save those type of exclamations for broken legs and what he considers really serious problems). Then as I'm trying to quickly get the sleeper off of him, he pukes again all over the changing table -- this time with more salmon colored stuff. His little body was shaking as he did it and I could see the sheer terror in his eyes because he clearly didn't understand what was happening to him. So again, I yell for DH to get off The Game (apparently even though that type of exclamation is supposed to be saved for extreme emergencies it still wasn't enough to pull him away).

So I undress him, and while DH hoses him down in the tub, I take off the changing pad cover and wipe the whole thing down with disinfectant, wipe down the outside of his mattress with the disinfectant, change the sheet and mattress pad cover ("we're now down to 1 clean mattress pad cover", I note in my head), and we get him dressed again. This time he's in a onesie and pants since we figured this might give us chance to change only the onesie and save the pants. All of this accomplished within I'd say 7 minutes.

At this point, I'm ready to call the doctor or take him to the emergency room. So I call the answering service for our pediatrician and ask him to call us. Tom does some research on the Interweb. I read about vomiting in one of the 3 books we have on babies. And we wait.

Ten minutes later, Monkey is crying again and this time, he's pooped his pants. Only it's NOT really POOP but greenish, nauseous smelling watery stuff. And yes, it's ON the mattress. So out he comes, we wipe him down, we change his onesie AND HIS PANTS (so much for that plan), and I change the bed and mattress pad one more time.

We finally decide that maybe we'll just breastfeed him for a minute or two and see how that stays down since he's acting like he's starving. Then as I'm holding him upright after that feeding, he pukes again. New outfit!

By this time an hour has passed with no call from the pediatrician's office. So I call the service again. About 5 minutes later, the doctor finally calls. DH talks to him and he suggests that we go get Pedialyte (which we figured he would since we had already read this and I had already figured out which grocery store near us is open 24 hours). DH runs to our Harris Teeter, gets the fluid and we give lil' Monkey some.

Luckily THAT stayed down and Monkey only had diarrhea one more time prior to going to bed. He slept until 8 this morning which is 2 hours longer than usual but that was good for us since we were up later with him. I felt like a wondering zombie most of last night after the drama was over. I was still pretty tired when we got up this morning as well.

He had some more diarrhea at some point in the night and we had to change him again when he woke up, but lucky for me, only the sheet bit the dust this time. We took him to the doctor this morning and they said to continue with the Pedialyte until this afternoon and try a little bit of breast milk again. If that stays down, we're good. And so far, it has so we are all relieved. However, the doctor said he might have diarrhea for 7-10 more days! I hope not. I'm sure I'll be keeping everyone posted on that one. My poor hands are already cracked and bleeding from all of the hand washing I've been doing lately. I'm just glad things are looking up for lil' Monkey.

This Week's Funny Quote

Tim Gunn of Bravo TV's Project Runway (in reference to a contestant's skirt):

"It looks like a coffee filter ... or a maxi pad."

Gotta love Tim Gunn!